Creationist School Books and What passes for Education in Intelligent Design!

Below is an comment I received in response to one of my blogs that was basically an advertisement for a Creationist school book series. I don’t get mad at this sort of thing since I do the same type of viral marketing with Flores Girl. On the other hand, I guess I don’t have a life so I actually looked the site up. Wow, talk about strange. I have never seen someone tie themselves up in mental knots like this before. I mean I once knew a girl who was good with knots but that’s an entirely different story and for a entirely new blog. Anyway, take a gander at this and see if any of this makes sense to you. I get this stuff all the time because of the name of my adventure podcast, Flores Girl: The Children Got Forgot. The creationist flog to the site like birds to freshly washed car. Did I mention Flores Girl was a free podcast at Podiobooks? Okay, I’m a marketing slut, I admit it.

Erik John Bertel


The Quest for !@#$, a series of 7 textbooks created for the public schools, represents the ultimate marriage between an in-depth knowledge of biblical phenomena and natural and physical sciences. (You got this is for the home schooled crowd -EjB) The several volumes have accomplished that which, heretofore, was deemed impossible: to level the playing field between those who desire a return to physical science in the classroom and those who embrace the theory of evolution. The Quest for Right turns the tide by providing an authoritative and enlightening scientific explanation of natural phenomena which will ultimately dethrone the unprofitable Darwinian view.

(How about a little dethroning via some scientific research and experimentation rather than saying god did it? -EjB)

The backbone of Darwinism is not biological evolution per se, but electronic interpretation, the tenet that all physical, chemical, and biological processes result from a change in the electron structure of the atom which, in turn, may be deciphered through the orderly application of mathematics, as outlined in quantum mechanics. A few of the supporting theories are: degrading stars, neutron stars, black holes, extraterrestrial water, antimatter, the absolute dating systems, and the big bang, the explosion of a singularity infinitely smaller than the dot of an “i” from which space, time, and the massive stellar bodies supposedly sprang into being.

(Huh, I guess this is how creationists try to explain randomness in the gene pool – EjB)

The philosophy rejects any divine intervention. Therefore, let the philosophy of Darwinism be judged on these specifics: electron interpretation and quantum mechanics. Conversely, the view that God is both responsible for and rules all the phenomena of the universe will stand or fall when the facts are applied. The view will not hinge on faith alone, but will be tested by the weightier principle of verifiable truths – the new discipline.

(Actually that is the province of physicists but what the heck if we muddy the water enough maybe nobody will notice all we are saying is god did it! – EjB)
The Quest for !@$# is not only better at explaining natural phenomena, but also may be verified through testing. As a consequence, the material in the several volumes will not violate the so-called constitutional separation of church and state. Physical science, the old science of cause and effect, will have a long-term sustainability, replacing irresponsible doctrines based on whim. Teachers and students will rejoice in the simplicity of earthly phenomena when entertained by the new discipline.

(Ouch, new discipline – that sounds scary, almost Catholic school-like. Still it could be fun with the right girl! Yikes, I’m starting to sound like a fetish freak!-EjB)

The Quest for !@#$ is not only an academic resource designed for the public schools, but also contains a wealth of information on pertinent subjects that seminarians need to know to be effective: geology, biology, geography, astronomy, chemistry, paleontology, and in-depth Biblical studies. The nuggets from the pages of Biblical history alone will give seminarians literally hundreds of fresh ideas for sermons and teachings. The ministry resources contained in The Quest for Right serve as invaluable aids that will enrich graduates beyond their highest expectations.

(Stephen Hawkins watch out, those wacky creationists scientists will be after you next! – EjB)

Here’s a passage from the book:

The investigation tackles the perplexing problem of how to reduce the earth’s heavy saturation of atmospheric water vapors on the first and second days of creation to their present level. Interestingly, light but not the sun was created on the first day; the sun was created on the fourth day. The cleric scholarship, unaccustomed to the laws of classical physics, has been rendered impotent in the submission of any viable mechanism. The league of scientists are similarly neutralized even though they have the answer within their grasp. The quandary leaves the investigation poised to solve the seemingly inexplicable riddle by incorporating the best of both worlds: the premises set down in the scientific record of creation and the fundamental rules of classical physics, which hold the universe in its grasp. The mystery is solved by entertaining a certain aspect of the marvelous water molecule.

(What the heck? Is it me or does any of this make sense? I know I am not home schooled but huh?- EJB)

You will not want to miss the adventure of a lifetime which awaits you in Volume 1 of The Quest for !@#$. (Wow, there are seven volumes of them)

“A book that will change the world.” – Wayne’s World, Editor, Vanity Publishing

(I thought the Bible did that? Hey, this is fun, it’s good to be the king- EjB)


6 Responses to “Creationist School Books and What passes for Education in Intelligent Design!”

  1. March 28, 2008 at 1:52 am


    For your information, we are in the process of shipping some 550 review copies of Volume 1 of The Quest for Right to state school board officials, congressmen, senators, and governors who have a desire to return physical science to the classroom. We are also sending review copies to self-acclaimed athiests and evolutionists. We welcome honest peer reviews.

    Although you have not claimed to be either a learned scientist or biblical scholar, I will be happy to send you a review copy. You just may change your mind about physical science — NO FAITH REQUIRED. If you do not want to provide a shipping address, you may purchase the book at most bookstores: Amazon.com, Borders.com, BarnesandNoble.com, Target.com, and many others.

    C. David Parsons

    P.S. I was surprised that you did not provide a link to the official website. It’s http://questforright.com I would think that many of your readers would have visited the site, even if it was for fun.

  2. March 28, 2008 at 2:03 am

    Don’t let it be said that I am not fair! I got to fix that damn spam filter however!

    Erik John Bertel

  3. March 28, 2008 at 2:52 am

    I may be overly optimistic, but I think even most creationists would interpret that as pseudoscientific tripe.

  4. 4 Jim Moore
    April 8, 2008 at 7:33 pm

    Hi EJB,

    I see our friend CDP has been lurking your site. When QfR came out, I got an e-book and read it and wrote a review, which you can read at:




  5. April 9, 2008 at 12:37 am

    Thanks for the review Jim. Hey, you got to give C. David Parsons some credit for creating such a unique world view and taking on everybody from Darwin to Einstein. Okay, it’s all a bit misguided and a lot of it doesn’t make much sense to me but again you can’t knock his ambition.

    Erik John Bertel

  6. 6 Jim Moore
    June 23, 2008 at 8:54 pm

    For the latest, see the reviews of QfR at Amazon. Above he says:

    “We welcome honest peer reviews,” but when mine was submitted he blocked my e-mail to him because I gave him a deservedly bad one. Shucks, wasn’t nearly as bad as Morton’s and Henke’s very recent reviews. Someone on a blog said I was too easy on him. Probably true.

    He says that Target carries the book. They did, for a little while, then dropped it. The rating at B&N is stuck near 600,000th place and Amazon has it at >1,500,000th place and dropping.

    Parsons never learned the adage “You are entitled to your own beliefs, but you’re not entitled to your own facts.”

    Jim Moore

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Flores Girl: The Children God Forgot is an exciting speculative adventure story about the discovery of a new prehistoric people by two scientists, Sarah and Richard. Their discovery is threatened by both religious zealots and marauding industrialists. Download the e-Book in PDF, Mobi and Microsoft Reader formats. Honest it is free at floresgirl.com. Just click the chick!

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RSS Download the Free Flores Girl Podcast at Podiobooks

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