10
Sep
08

Sarah Palin and the Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed Creationists

It’s funny how life comes full circle to anybody who is paying attention. I started out writing this blog hoping to discuss some of the issues writers face trying in their efforts to get published. Frankly, writing can be a lonely and sometimes unrewarding task and book publishers don’t make the task any easier. A process that is inherently tied to communication can cause the individual to drown in their isolation and consequently I felt talking about such a task could at least ameliorate some of the pain. As I worked with my Flores Girl novel I found that the subject matter of my book was getting some unwarranted attention from a number of cranky creationists. Flores Girl: The Children God Forgot is a cautionary tale about the discovery of a prehistoric dwarf tribe by a pair of scientists and, of course, is a complete work of fiction. Well, that wasn’t good enough for some of my creationist detractors because the title contained the word “god” and made some implicit assumptions about mankind’s evolution and that was enough to illicit some seriously cranky email. And you know how the fundamentalists are all about the written word!

So, seeking revenge and some personal amusement, I decided to go off on that craptacular movie called “Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed” from Ben Stein. After a while, I became less amused with the blog and tired of the pointless arguments with people who read exactly two books in their lives: the bible and the instruction manual to their trailer home. So after failing to find an Expelled bootleg, I boldly pointed out that nobody cared about ID and creationism since there was a presidential election going on and that a crappy Bush-inspired war economy had everybody more worried about foreclosure. Furthermore, the creationist creeps were going to have a tough time choosing between Obama or McCain since neither one was particularly accommodating to their simplistic world bible views.

Boy, was I wrong on that prognostication! Nostradamus I am not! No sooner did I make that stupid forecast McCain goes out and adds some Alaskan Creationist- Secessionist- Pro-Life-Pro-Gun-MILF to his ticket as his VP, all after an incredibly long vetting process that must have transpired during the duration of a single bowel movement. And I should add that I am a McCain supporter!

So what of Sarah Palin and her religious beliefs? Well, five to six years ago she was a member of a Pentecostal church, the Assembly of God to be exact. Now these rocket scientists believe in a literal bible, talking in tongues, faith healing and, how can we forget, the ever popular end-of-times. We have had so many end of times I don’t were to begin. This type of inspired lunacy leads to such clear thinking as “it’s God’s will that is being done in Iraq.” Funny, I thought that was the work of a mediocre son looking to clear his daddy’s historical record but, hey, what the hell do I know? I mean we went in there to separate those heathens from the WMD’s right? Eh, okay the weapons weren’t there but we did bring freedom to the Iraqis, right? You know freedom from boredom as the local militia executes the men in your family but hey that’s God’s plan and you can’t argue about the big picture, right?

The good news is that God’s plans are not just relegated to simple matters of war. No way! Did you know that a new pipe line is a task from God? Me, I was thinking Exxon-Mobil but I guess I think way too small. Really, Palin said this. God’s will is to be done developing our natural resources, never mind all we are doing is feeding a nasty oil habit and that the sooner we can move to something alternative the sooner we can tell the idiots in the Middle East what they can do with their oil.  Ask Sarah about Creationism and she’ll reply sure Creationism should be taught in school!  We don’t have a lick of proof that it can’t stand up to rigorous scientific review but hell proof didn’t stop us from invading Iraq.

That said, Sarah Palin is not stupid. Unlike Obama, she had the good sense to realize that once she became a mainstream Republican she had to leave behind the small town church that inspired a thousand tongues. In fact, she does not does not consider herself Pentecostal anymore but I do wonder if she feels that God can still be accessed? And what about the view that Alaska is the preferred shelter for Christians in the end-of-times? There has been some talk that she is also anti-Israel but really has she ever met a Jew? Ben Stein for example? I mean really, has she?

All I know is the Expelled crowd is really charged up again and we have McCain to thank for this madness. Soon we’ll get all sorts of new home school and ID initiatives coursing through the mediocre halls of Congress. I’m thinking of voting for Obama now just for spite but damn I don’t want my taxes to go up again! What’s a thinking evolutionist to do? And where is Hillary in all this mess? Can’t she remind women not to cast their vote based on their chromosomes but to vote instead on the issues? After all, who do they think they are? Men? Someday, perhaps after the election, I hope to get back to writing about writing rather than about politics and fundamentalists. And to think, if they had just left me alone this all could have been avoided!

More on Hillary: No Political Catifght with Palin

More on Palin “Governor Palin You’re No Hillary Clinton!”

More on Palin with this story,“Apparently-Bristol-Palin-is-no-Chelsea-Clinton-Either”

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7 Responses to “Sarah Palin and the Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed Creationists”


  1. September 10, 2008 at 3:25 am

    Great analysis. Thanks!

    Palin is Pro-War! She calls it “a task from God.”
    This mixing of God and war I find very sad.
    And it’s costing us Hundreds of Billions of Dollars.

    Check it out:

  2. September 11, 2008 at 12:11 am

    Unfortunately, you can take her at her word. She is not a hypocrite because she has her own son in the military and that makes these words even scarier. Can you say “holy war”?

    Erik John Bertel

  3. 3 Andrew Sandstrom
    April 1, 2009 at 6:44 am

    Intelligent Design is very limited when it comes to a creationist point of view. It’s assuming that the earth is billions of years old, when it really isn’t.

    The Geological column and several key theories brought it about. And assumptions that places like the Grand Canyon take many many years to form. (And this is an interpretation, not fact. It’s never been proven.)

    Our dating methods have been proven wrong a long time ago. Although, once evolution started leaking into mainstream media and everyone had started to accept that the earth is billions of years old, nobody dared question our modern-day methods except darwinists.

    And now we’ve been repeatedly fed this bull crap about how the earth is billions of years old. We’re now looking upon every other theory as immediately dismissable.

    Watch Kent Hovind’s creation series. You’ll find that the modern-day creationist views are ‘very’ different than ID. ID is still a way for humanists who don’t believe in a God but also don’t find evolution a very reliable theory to explain life. Ex: There was a designer, but it’s never showed itself to us.

    You can believe whatever you want, all I’m saying is that evolution is an interpretation of the FACTS. Grand Canyon existing is a FACT. That it was created over millions or billions of years is THEORY. It cannot be observed so it cannot be proven.

    In short: Show a little more respect to another person’s beliefs. Just because you believe in evolution doesn’t mean you’ve come along more intellectually.

  4. 4 Andrew Sandstrom
    April 1, 2009 at 6:44 am

    Oh, and Kent Hovind’s website: http://www.drdino.com

  5. April 1, 2009 at 12:30 pm

    “There is no darkness but ignorance” and this is especially evident when religious zealots talk about scientific observation. You realize that due to the advent of laser and computer technology and now through GPS, we can actually measure mountains rising and tectonic plates spreading apart, right? Or don’t they teach these scientific facts in your religious compound?

    For example, the massive Indo-Australian plate is still moving at 67 mm or for you metric phobes, about 3 inches a year. That very same plate is still pushing up the Himalaya Mountains. So do the math and by multiplying by millions of years, and use a calculator if you must, to see how the earth is constantly changing over time. So don’t give me that crap we haven’t seen it. You might as well argue that the GPS in your car doesn’t work while you are it. Speaking of which, I didn’t see my car being built but it’s a pretty safe assumption it was built by Americans in a U.S. factory and not by angels in heaven (hopefully not by devils but that could explain a lot!) And yes, I do buy American!

    Religious zealots chose to conveniently ignore the facts and look for weakness along the fringes of science hoping beyond hope to see some glimpse of God. Albert Einstein tried to do the same and he failed miserably by the way so I don’t think you’re going to fare much better. That’s why we call it faith by the way. And faith is fine but don’t tell me you have the right to teach this ignorance in a public school. It’s important to separate the teaching of science from the preaching of faith and you just have to look to the Taliban to see where religious ignorance will lead you.

    Oh, as to the link to that Creationist site look if you must for a needed laugh but it’s more of the usual Creationist denial and crapfest material. I like the negative article about the chickenosaurus, which is an attempt by biologists to turn genes on and off to recreate a ancestral dinosaur from it’s descendant: a common everyday chicken. For example, they have been able to grow teeth in chicken embryos which is pretty impressive by playing around with a few genes. As to the ethics of doing this, well that is another matter. Here’s a better link:http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/discoblog/2009/03/10/will-jurassic-park-ever-really-come-true/

    Erik John Bertel

  6. 6 Andrew Sandstrom
    May 20, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    There is a way to explain the moving plates. You’re assuming that the plates have always been moving. It could have been started due to a catastrophe. The Earth has huge stocks of water beneath its crusts. And it was said in the bible that the fountains of the deep broke open during the flood. There would be cracks showing such an evetn happened. (The fault lines) We don’t ignore scientific evidence we just give a different interpretation. There are many assumptions that are made to accomodate an old earth theory, which are impossible to observe. But the theories are created so that the old earth does not lose its steam. Instead of scientifically proving something against a creationist’s evidence, theories on what should have happened are brought forth and the proof for this is found in the assumption that the Earth is old and this is what HAS to have happened.

    I’m in a rush, so I cannot find my sources. Our family is leaving soon.

    Anywhatever, here’s some proof:

    1. Comets only last up to 10,000 years.
    2. Magnetic field is weakening (The assumption against this is that our field has a reversal, but this is not observable. Maybe small reversals like a small part of the plate flipping over causing this.)
    3. Saturn and Jupiter should have cooled long ago.
    4. Galaxies spiraling backwards
    5. Planets having reversed orbits

    I have observed the arguements against this and it’s nothing but another piece of patchwork on an old earth and old universe theory.

    I suppose you can choose your own interpretation but don’t tell me that evolution is science.

    And if you tell me that evolution is unrelated to the age of the universe or the Earth, tell me this:

    Is evolution a good theory with a younger universe and planet?

  7. 7 Andrew Sandstrom
    May 20, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    Oh and anybody who tries to justify a war with christianity is a dumbass.


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Flores Girl: The Children God Forgot is an exciting speculative adventure story about the discovery of a new prehistoric people by two scientists, Sarah and Richard. Their discovery is threatened by both religious zealots and marauding industrialists. Download the e-Book in PDF, Mobi and Microsoft Reader formats. Honest it is free at floresgirl.com. Just click the chick!

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RSS Download the Free Flores Girl Podcast at Podiobooks

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  • The Capture
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  • The Guardian Meets the Lab Rat
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